I'm trying to decide if this is an improvement

"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein)
11/22/2017 at 12:26 • Filed to: None

Today I saw a Honda Crosstour on my way to work. This reminded me that I’ve actually driven a Crosstour, and I liked it as a comfy cruiser all-weather DD type car, even though it’s hideous to look at. So I took a crack at trying to clean up the looks a little bit.

My first thought was to try and do something with the awful, too-big grille. So I made the large gray plastic bits on the side body color, and I made the chrome cross bars black.

I left the thicker top cross bar chrome, because I felt like something was a little off when I made it black.

But then I realized maybe the reason the black top cross bar looked weird is because it contrasts with the chrome window trim and door handles, so I blacked out the window trim and made the handles body color.

HMMMMMMMM.

Maybe now we’re getting somewhere. The ride height and wheels are still all doofy but this feels a lot cleaner to me and I don’t feel like messing with the wheels and ride height in !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! at work.

But, I kinda like it much better this way. Maybe?

DISCUSSION (47)

Nibby > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:38

still needs to be lit on fire but a smaller one

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:38

Better option: get an Acura ZDX instead

Kinja'd!!!

It’s the better looking twin sister

Future next gen S2000 owner > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:39

Looks like a previous generation Sonata from the front.

Kinja'd!!!

jimz > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 12:40

badonkadonk-adonk

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:40

Find a relatively low mileage Acura TSX Wagon that has been well maintained and poof there you go.

HammerheadFistpunch > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:42

it needed to be a wagon, plane and simple.

Kinja'd!!!

I mean, this is a terrible photoshop and the end result is terrible...but...its still better than a crosstour.

Azrek > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 12:43

Next light it on fire...and step away

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > HammerheadFistpunch
11/22/2017 at 12:44

Put a Mercedes star on it, call it a shooting brake, and you’ve got yourself an FP wet dream

HammerheadFistpunch > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/22/2017 at 12:44

It did come out very silver arrow didn’t it?

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute
11/22/2017 at 12:45

Can’t get the TSX wagon with AWD or 6 cylinders though.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/22/2017 at 12:47

I thought they had an optional 6? But you’re right about the AWD thing. Hold up, I think in confusing it with the TL.

Textured Soy Protein > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 12:48

In spite of the shape that’s similar to the Crosstour, the ZDX is actually an MDX with a chopped down roof and shortened wheelbase. Its back seat is particularly useless.

cbell04 > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:11

The only thing more embarrassing than driving a crosstour is driving one from a strangely named dealership.

Kinja'd!!!

http://oppositelock.kinja.com/thanks-dick-1584252483

boxrocket > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:12

Headlamps and grille need to be lower to reduce the visual weight, and trim the back bumper back a bit.

The crosstour lives on in the new civic hatch, so maybe borrow some cues from that, since it seems wildly more popular than the crosstour.

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:12

Kinja'd!!!

Mmmm...yeah, I’m not buy your excuse.

Buy a Toyota Venza, then.

Kinja'd!!!

boxrocket > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 13:13

Ick, no. Even worse visibility, and looks like some weird-ass ergonomic computer mouse.

Textured Soy Protein > HammerheadFistpunch
11/22/2017 at 13:14

In spite of the fastback roofline it’s still pretty damn roomy in the back.

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Only thing is the wheel wells intrude a lot, and I don’t think they even really need to be that large. Edmunds has an in-depth look at the suspension and it seems like there’s more than enough clearance.

Also, interestingly enough, that article says the awd system in the Crosstour is apparently not an electronic setup and instead is a clutch pack actuated by a hydraulic pumps. Pressure builds up based on front/rear axle speed difference. Pretty similar to the Jeep WJ and other hydraulic gerotor setups, although operating in reverse since the Crosstour is using it to engage the rear axle vs. the front in the Jeeps.

boxrocket > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 13:15

Venza is a good choice. The grille on the earlier ones looks dumb, and the tail lights were always going to be awkward, but it’s an excellent tall-Camry.

boxrocket > Future next gen S2000 owner
11/22/2017 at 13:16

That’s an insult to that-generation Sonata.

HammerheadFistpunch > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:16

yeah, the original CR-V used a gerotor AWD, it wasn’t bad.

Textured Soy Protein > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 13:19

Funny you mention the Venza. The real inspiration for this post was the fact that I like how the Crosstour drives but it’s hideous.

I actually think the Crosstour is nicer than the Venza except for the whole ugly issue.

Amoore100 > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 13:25

MARK X ZIO

Kinja'd!!!

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:26

I have a feeling that you’re just avoiding a Subaru Outback

Textured Soy Protein > HammerheadFistpunch
11/22/2017 at 13:27

It’s funny, even though I’m not actually going to do this anytime soon, I keep thinking about what comfy cruiser awd wagon/hatch/CUV/SUV I would get to go with a fun car. The ideas I’ve kicked around include the Crosstour, Venza, Sorento, Santa Fe Sport, or...a WJ Overland (for that sweet sweet triple gerotor action) to which I’d add a few on-road biased suspension tweaks.

Textured Soy Protein > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 13:32

If I got an Outback it would be a stick shift XT and turned into a sleeper tunerbro car. I don’t love them for my comfy cruiser all-weather DD idea though. And the 2010-14 is even uglier than the Crosstour.

Kinja'd!!!

Boxer_4 > HammerheadFistpunch
11/22/2017 at 13:48

No photoshop required:

Kinja'd!!!

I wish the mule was the production car!

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/22/2017 at 13:53

E-Class wagon

328d xDrive longroof?

Textured Soy Protein > boredalways
11/22/2017 at 14:00

The other thing I want is something that’s reliable or at least cheap to repair. Something comfy and trouble free. Don’t want a luxury brand and its associated costs. Yes I drive a BMW right now.

I’ve looked at the Crosstour, Venza, Sorento, Santa Fe Sport, or....an old Jeep Grand Cherokee.

None of which will be purchased anytime soon.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Boxer_4
11/22/2017 at 14:07

It’s like a Japanese Magnum

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/23/2017 at 14:46

For future consideration: ‘09 Outback 2.5XT 5MT Limited

Kinja'd!!!

https://www.cag513.com/inventory/details/35253348

*sorry that i can’t help myself but I enjoy giving and receiving car suggestions.

HAPPY TURKEY DAY!

Dusty Ventures > boredalways
11/23/2017 at 17:44

I’m not sure what context you’re suggesting this in, but I approve regardless

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Textured Soy Protein
11/23/2017 at 17:58

Kinja'd!!!

boxrocket > Textured Soy Protein
11/23/2017 at 18:29

So time for a an XC70 or V90XC then?

boredalways > Dusty Ventures
11/23/2017 at 20:14

I was throwing out way too many suggestions the other day, but remembered that Atlas was ok with this one.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > Textured Soy Protein
11/23/2017 at 20:49

We had a customer with a Crosstour who put 20" wheels and a 2" drop on his and it just looked right. It was about like this but with less low. Also it was black:

Kinja'd!!!

He said he wanted a Panamera but had Accord money.

awmaster10 > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection
11/23/2017 at 21:38

If it was one with the j35 and he put some exhaust on it it would sing too. Honestly, im cool with it.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > awmaster10
11/24/2017 at 11:21

His was a 4-cylinder EX. He put black and tan interior in it. It looked good, but wasn’t spectacular.

Textured Soy Protein > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection
11/24/2017 at 17:52

The trick with these is there aren’t many options for properly modifying the suspension. I think you can use shocks and springs from the TL SH-AWD. Its awd system is not the same as the TL though.

Textured Soy Protein > boxrocket
11/24/2017 at 17:54

Nah if I get any comfy cruiser it will either be something relatively new-ish from an Asian brand, or get a 2002-04 Grand Cherokee Overland and fix it back up.

Textured Soy Protein > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles
11/24/2017 at 17:56

That car was the inspiration for my idea but I think painting the whole grille white like that looks terrible. The vertical bars in the middle need to stay flat black. The stancebro treatment doesn’t help either.

Textured Soy Protein > boredalways
11/24/2017 at 17:58

In my hands that wouldn’t remain a comfy cruiser for long.

boredalways > Textured Soy Protein
11/24/2017 at 21:23

IKR?

Too bad I’m too big for for it (MY2005-2009 just doesn’t work for anyone over 6')

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Textured Soy Protein
11/27/2017 at 13:27

This seems kind of like the E60 5-series I test drove when those were new. The salesman asked me what I thought whilst I was driving, and I replied that it looked much better from this viewpoint. It helped that it was dark out so I couldn’t see the interior (which was a disappointment, IMHO, after the E34 and E39).

Jason Spears > Textured Soy Protein
11/27/2017 at 20:51

Congratulations, you’ve successfully completed your orientation. Now on to your first mission.

Kinja'd!!!

Textured Soy Protein > Jason Spears
11/27/2017 at 23:38

I did make this one small change to it back in July...

Kinja'd!!!

Jason Spears > Textured Soy Protein
11/28/2017 at 08:07

It’s still there.

Kinja'd!!!

Textured Soy Protein > Jason Spears
11/28/2017 at 16:33

Ok, fine.

Kinja'd!!!

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